When you’re writing a memoir, sometimes the story teaches you what it’s really about.
The Original Vision
Six months ago, I was certain my memoir would be called Songs of Silence: Growing Up in a Story Not My Own. It felt right at the time. I was thinking about the Keeper – my controlling mother who warned me against everything she herself had done. About forging signatures just to attend sex education class. About growing up voiceless in a house where fear masqueraded as protection.
I thought this was a story about being silenced.
I was wrong.
What the Story Actually Revealed
As I’ve written deeper into this narrative, excavating memories and examining patterns across three generations, a different truth emerged. This isn’t really about being silenced at all.
This is about strategy.
It’s about the choice I made after my house burned down and I had to trust my daughter to her father’s family. It’s about the years that followed when they played dirty – weaponizing custody time, erasing memories, turning a child against her mother – while I played the long game.
I could have fought fire with fire. I could have matched their manipulation with my own. Instead, I chose a different path: military strategy applied to motherhood.
Why “Mission: Hurry Up and Wait” Captures Everything
Every veteran knows this phrase. It’s uniquely military – that experience of urgent preparation followed by disciplined waiting. You hurry to get ready, then you wait for the right moment to act.
That’s exactly what strategic love looks like.
I hurried up: served my country, earned my degree, studied psychology, learned about trauma and healing and different learning styles. I armed myself with tools my mother never had, prepared for a reunion I refused to doubt would come.
Then I waited. Maintained connection across distance. Called when I could. Sent care packages. Recorded voice messages on build-a-bear ponies. Proved my love through presence, not manipulation.
I played the long game while others played dirty.
The Subtitle That Completes the Picture
Building Bridges Across Generational Wounds captures the three-generation arc of this story. The Keeper’s trauma that created controlling behavior. My journey from controlled daughter to conscious mother. My daughter’s path from manipulation back to authentic love.
It’s about breaking cycles through intention rather than just survival.
What This Means for the Book
The story itself hasn’t changed – every scene, every insight, every hard-won victory remains the same. But now the title reflects what this memoir is really about: strategic motherhood, patient warfare, and the military precision it takes to break generational trauma.
This isn’t a victim’s story. It’s a victor’s strategy guide.
For My Fellow Military Parents
If you’re reading this and you’ve ever had to fight for your children – not with fists or fury, but with patient, strategic love – you’ll understand why this title feels right.
We know how to hurry up and wait. We know how to prepare for missions that matter. We know that the greatest victories often come not from overwhelming force, but from outlasting those who mistake cruelty for strength.
Sometimes the most powerful weapon is patience with a plan.
What’s Next
The manuscript is taking shape beautifully under its new title. I’m working toward a publication timeline that I’ll share soon, along with cover reveals and more behind-the-scenes glimpses into this story that’s teaching me as much as I hope it will teach readers.
Thank you for being part of this journey from the beginning. Your support and encouragement have meant everything as this story has found its truest form.
The mission continues.
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